Fallen, Buried Alive and Lost In Darkness

Fallen from the sky and hit the ground with full force breaking my wings on the way down, I shiver and curl my fragile state body into a ball hugging myself as I cry into the ground, feathers scattered everywhere, blood oozing from my shoulder blades. I lay there still like a corpse in darkness crying out for help, all alone and lost in this dark and cold empty place, wondering why, all confused and mixed emotions. I've never felt so much pain. Burned and buried me alive. "Why"? I ask myself.

My heart feels burned, I've been buried alive, my heart turning to ashes, my soul driven into a black hole and lost in eternity, lost in this cold and dark empty place. 

No matter what I do to take my mind off it, that pain, that darkness, that cold and empty place, the scar will always remain.

To be continued...

Excitement and Time

Ever been so excited for something that you can't sleep, counting sheep in your sleep just to pass the time lol or even can't think straight that you end up getting on the wrong bus lol...and the time goes sooooo slow that it drags...counting down the days......haha yep that's me all over...

This is just a joke...How to pas the time: hibernate like an animal until the day comes :D haha

Time Stops

Beautiful eyes open across a pillow top,
It seems for this moment time will stop,
The earth slows and sounds wane,
A frozen moment without stain.

Your body close to mine,
Our hearts beat in time,
With a smile of simple pleasure,
This moment should last forever.

Some say perfection is unattainable
For most things that's explainable,
But in your arms and with your heart's affection
I have found a brief moment of perfection.

Paradise - Solar

This type of music sends me on journeys on a higher consciousness level

The Feeling Within

I dropped my towel leaving me exposed in the nude as I walked along the beach with my feet leaving footprints in the sand, as I walked the warm sea splashed upon my feet as the tide was going in and out.

I layed down on my front on the sand letting the sea take over splashing my skin and the feeling of the water splashing and washing me all over my back and my bum sending nice chills down my spine..

I then stood up.. hair dripping of water down my face... I closed my eyes and took a deep breath and ran across the warm soft sand and into the oceans waves being washed away, purified and cleansed.

I dived through the waves and swimming like a mermaid free diving in the nude, as I looked up from under water I could see sparkling light reflections of the sun shimmering and rippling right in front of my eyes.. like heaven was opening up to me.

I heard beautiful sounds and music coming from within, that lifted me within me. As I carried on swimming like a mermaid, I realised..I was purified and cleansed within...

I was the woman of the sea

The Feeling Of Being Connected With The Earth

The rain is lush I like the feeling of the raindrops hitting my face, I like the refreshing and cooling feeling and the cleansed feeling. The air smells clear and more crisp. I like sitting inside sometimes on rainy days when it’s really cold wrapping myself in a warm blanket, sipping hot tea and curling up with a good book listening to the rain outside. It gives me the sensation of being renewed just like a plant it gives me life and cleanses me.

Ever since I was very young I always felt deep inside I had a purpose on this earth just like everybody else does sometimes but I have a strong connection with certain things. The beach/ocean is one of them, I have always been so deeply connected to it. The oceans waters and the winds sounds like soft music being played to me or  talking to me. Just sitting on the beach when no one is around and it’s all quiet especially at night when the moon is dazzling the waters, I sit there and the oceans waters feels like it’s talking to me. I have a love for the earth and nature, it keeps me alive.

Standing on the earth in bare foot feels like I'm being more closer and connected to the earth. The way I feel for the earth and it’s nature is like I’m drifting like a nice feeling of flowing energy flowing through my body like the wind, I get goosebumps with a flow of coldness shooting down my spine and a drifting feeling of nice energy in my body that feels like chills.

The Question

Does anyone get that feeling that you just know something is up or is wrong, the gut feeling in your stomach??

I have so many questions that I like to ask but probably will never get an answer. I'm the kind of person that likes to asks questions but I never seem to get an answer or the right one that I'm looking for.


I've been looking for answers to my questions for years but no luck yet. Maybe I'll never find them. It's not something you can "Google" and bam!..there's an answer! it's more complicated than that.